Its a Lazy Sunday morning, one time during the year when you just don't feel the need of a air-conditioner. I hear from the newspaper that the temperature has dipped by 4 degrees, hovering at around 19 Degrees Celsius. This lovely weather is a luxury for people in Chennai, and yours truly feels the need to be under the comfort of a blanket. Just as the eyes want to shut off to slumber, the mobile rings and its Sudarshan, the COO of our Cricket Academy on line. Sudarshan wants me to quickly come to the ground to have a conversation with the founder of our academy Ravichandran Uncle.
Its a opportunity that I cannot really refuse because any conversation with uncle is worth its weight in Gold. I quickly take a few mugs of shower, ice cold water mind you, The Geyser can wait, no time for hot water. I don't want to miss any of the conversation. So after that bone chilling bath I quickly rush to the RKM grounds. On the way in my mind I have already decided that this conversation will lay centered around Parenting. TBK has so many questions up in my heart to ask of Uncle and doubts to be clarified from a Parents perspective. I am on time, as I drive my bike around the curve, I can see Uncle's car coming in the opposite direction.
Customary Greetings follow. As usual I am in awe of Uncle not just because of the fact that he happens to be Ashwins father, but because of the fact that he is ready to strike a friendly conversation with anyone. I bow my head humbly to the simplicity of the Gentleman. So our conversation begins.
TBK: Uncle, When I admit my child to any Cricket Academy, the general expectation is that my child should be in the playing Eleven of any tournament. Parental Pressure and Expectations are on the rise. As a Parent what is your advice to a Parent like me?
Uncle: First of all the Parents can come and watch the children play from a distance. Getting closer to the children or the coaches during the hours of practice is a strict no. My son scored five runs or six runs , again a question in futility. Yes after the practice is over they can and must talk to the coaches about their children's performance.How can my child improve on his skills is a very valid question. My son did not get a chance to play in a tournament is a wrong question. Be at the receiving end and take all the feedback that the coach gives. Don't complain. As a parent you must be above everything else. You cannot and should not influence his selection. Don't try and get close to the selectors or coaches.
TBK: There is another expectation that if I put my son in a Cricket Academy, He will become a star player like Ashwin. How valid is that kind of an expectation or otherwise?
Uncle: That is a very wrong expectation. When Ashwin was growing up I never knew that he would play for India. Even when he was in the Ranji team I did not have that kind of an expectation. There is and there will be politics in the game. When a player gets popular, there is bound to be jealousy and other kinds of challenges. At such a critical juncture it becomes very important that you support your child as a Parent. Let me give you an example. Two boys are in the center batting. One boy is striking well and he is 42 not out. The boy at the other end struggles his way to a 12 and gets out. The immediate reaction in the Parents will be. See that boy got 42, my son got only 12. At the spur of the moment scolds the boy saying: See How well that boy is playing and how badly you played. Never scold a child about his performance. Give him friendly advice instead. Finally you don't dream that your child should become big in sport. Allow your child to dream big. You as a Parent can support his dreams.
TBK: What kind of positive or negative impact can Parents or Coaches have on the child?
Uncle: It can be a huge factor. Parents getting together and having a negative discussion about your own child or someone else's child. By all means get together and discuss but don't discuss the average performances of your child in front of other parents/coaches/selectors.This can have a ripple effect. It reaches the ears of the selectors and it becomes a sort of chain reaction, spreading like a disease, thereby affecting the future prospects of the child. Secondly Coaches and Selectors should form an unbiased opinion of the sportsman, and should never go by hearsay or based on the opinion of other coaches and parents. See the child perform, and suggest corrections. Give Positive advice that will encourage the growth of the child. Thirdly when it comes to selection, coaches and selectors should keep in mind that they never go by the reputation or name of the Cricket Academy. They should once again oversee the performance of the child and then form an opinion.
TBK: Academics or Cricket Which is more important?
Uncle: Right Eye or Left Eye, which is more important? TBK: Both eyes are equally important Uncle. Uncle: Yes you are right, both eyes are important. Similarly Cricket is as important as academics. As a parent you are responsible for your child's growth. You need to take active interest in his academics as your child. When Ashwin was growing up, I used to do all the running around. He would play matches, I would go to his school and make a note of all the lessons that he had missed. Ashwin would come and insist on going to the ground. I would incentivize him. Finish this lesson and then go to the ground. He would tap the ball at home. At that moment I would ask questions from his subjects and prepare him for his examinations. Till his tenth standard, I would prepare by going through his text books, understanding the lesson myself before teaching it to him. If I had any doubts I would not hesitate in asking doubts from his friends or subject teachers. I knew each of his teachers by name and still remember them. When he reached his 11th standard, I had him shifted to a State Board school-St.Bedes. I understood that in the state board curriculum, the same thing had to be learnt over and over again. I would not understand a thing but would make him to repeat that Mathematical and Science Equations over and over again, till he had learnt it. As parent I had encouraged him to play sports and study well. There needs to be a balance between the two. As a parent it is your responsibility to ensure that the balance is maintained.
Pearls of wisdom indeed, especially when it comes from Ravichandran Uncle who has seen all of it from the eyes of a parent. This blog is meant for all parents all across the globe. We keep having these conversations and will bring you more in the days to come, so stay tuned in to us for more.
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